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| "cheese" |
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| she's so proud of herself |
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Potty break
Savannah has shown great interest in going potty the past 2 months. She will come to me and tell me when her diaper is wet and when it's dirty which is a sign she is ready to start potty training. The problem is time on my part~dedicating a week to staying home and focusing my time on potty training her. I will attempt to try it when I come back from PA next week. Pray this goes smoothly and I will only be down to one child in diapers. It's not even the fact that I have to buy diapers, because I don't, we have about 20 packages of diapers. It would just be nice to not have to worry about changing diapers for 2 children. She has yet to actually go on the potty, but at least right now she is interested. She is only 19 months old so I'm not going to push it if she is not truly ready. Sydney was potty trained completely by 2 1/2 and never had an accident even at night! Hoping and praying Savannah will be just as easy ;)
The trio painting
Figured it was time to bust out the paints~the organic ones~just love them! I was daring and painted with all 3 together. Of course this took some preplanning on my part~prep the tubbies so I could throw them in after painting, and of course who goes in first because I can't quite leave Xavier in the tub by himself while getting the other two. No wonder why I never sleep~always preplanning and trying to stay one step ahead of the kiddos.
Xavier wasn't quite into it this time, well, he wasn't into it at all last time either. I tried him sitting up this time, but will start having him paint while doing tummy time to strengthen those back muscles. He wasn't sure what to make of the paint at first, very curious of the texture.
Sydney and Savannah used paint brushes to paint. Sydney whipped through 3 papers while Savannah slowly took her time painting her beautiful work. Savannah would get a little upset when she got paint on her hands, but quickly got over it. Sydney will talk me through every step of her art work~what she is painting, what she will do next, what colors she would like for each part and on and on :)
Xavier wasn't quite into it this time, well, he wasn't into it at all last time either. I tried him sitting up this time, but will start having him paint while doing tummy time to strengthen those back muscles. He wasn't sure what to make of the paint at first, very curious of the texture.
Sydney and Savannah used paint brushes to paint. Sydney whipped through 3 papers while Savannah slowly took her time painting her beautiful work. Savannah would get a little upset when she got paint on her hands, but quickly got over it. Sydney will talk me through every step of her art work~what she is painting, what she will do next, what colors she would like for each part and on and on :)
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| he's thinking...."this is interesting..." |
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| enjoying some painting time |
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| taking her time |
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| he's still not sure about this stuff |
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| Just needed his binky, now he's into it. |
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| The Trio! |
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| Not thrilled she has paint on her hands. |
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| What a shocker~he's happy :) |
Bouncy~Bouncy
I just began putting Xavier in the bouncer~the first day I tried it he spent an hour in there, he just absolutely loves it! I love it because he has a great time and it's strengthening his leg muscles. He has definitely got the hang of how to bounce himself as well as turn himself all about to play with all the toys. I love watching him grow up, but so sad that he isn't my little baby anymore! :(
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| happy man :) |
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| Throwing himself all about bouncing in there! |
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Songs
During the time I spent with Xavier in the hospital I used music to express how I was feeling with the different emotions that I was feeling at the time. There are 3 songs that have so much meaning to me, and still to this day I love listening to them and of course love to sing to~and there actually was a point where I was sprawled out on the hospital floor singing "It is well". A nurse came in to check to see if I was alright and then just laughed at me. :) It was definitely one of my ways of coping through the whole ordeal. These songs have so much meaning to me and I know I have posted them through Facebook before, but I thought I would share with those who do not have Facebook and as well for me to remember one day looking back. It is nice to have them all in one spot to remember.
The song "It is well" was actually the song we sang the Sunday at church prior to Xavier going into the hospital. At that point Will had already left, but who knew things could get worse and it had to be "well with my soul". I cried that Sunday as we sang that song knowing that God would get me through and it would be "well with my soul" but that it would just take time. I can listen and sing that song finally without tears because God has made everything "well with my soul".
The song "Blessings" still brings tears to my eyes when I hear it. It was and still is a comforting song to know that we will all go through trials, but God is always there. Some of my favorite lines and truths to remember: "Trails of this life are your mercies in disguise", "You hear our desperate plea as long as we have faith to believe." My absolute favorite line of the song "pain reminds our heart that this is not our home" Wonderful reminder that although we may suffer here on earth we will no longer suffer in heaven. This life is only temporary.
The song "I will survive" is my upbeat song to know that in the end I will still survive. It might not seem that to be true in the moment, but we all go through trials and survive. Most of the time we change and grow through those trials, and I know I definitely have in so many areas. This is a song that has always been one of my favorites~it has great memories to it from work at BH :) This actually became my ring tone on my phone and makes me smile every time someone calls. :)
Overall, these are just great songs whenever you are going through a trial!
It is well~Kutless
Blessings~Laura Story
I will survive~Gloria Gaynor
The song "It is well" was actually the song we sang the Sunday at church prior to Xavier going into the hospital. At that point Will had already left, but who knew things could get worse and it had to be "well with my soul". I cried that Sunday as we sang that song knowing that God would get me through and it would be "well with my soul" but that it would just take time. I can listen and sing that song finally without tears because God has made everything "well with my soul".
The song "Blessings" still brings tears to my eyes when I hear it. It was and still is a comforting song to know that we will all go through trials, but God is always there. Some of my favorite lines and truths to remember: "Trails of this life are your mercies in disguise", "You hear our desperate plea as long as we have faith to believe." My absolute favorite line of the song "pain reminds our heart that this is not our home" Wonderful reminder that although we may suffer here on earth we will no longer suffer in heaven. This life is only temporary.
The song "I will survive" is my upbeat song to know that in the end I will still survive. It might not seem that to be true in the moment, but we all go through trials and survive. Most of the time we change and grow through those trials, and I know I definitely have in so many areas. This is a song that has always been one of my favorites~it has great memories to it from work at BH :) This actually became my ring tone on my phone and makes me smile every time someone calls. :)
Overall, these are just great songs whenever you are going through a trial!
It is well~Kutless
Blessings~Laura Story
I will survive~Gloria Gaynor
Sitting
I have had concerns over the lack of back muscles with Xavier. Seeing as he didn't do tummy time for about 3 months and the fact the first surgery cut into his back muscles I knew there would be some delay in some of his large motor skills. At about 6 months old most children are sitting up for at least a few seconds at a time. As of last week Xavier would just flop forward as if he was a newborn and just fall over. Within the past 2 weeks of working with him he has gained some muscle and can now sit up for about 5-10 seconds! Such a huge improvement even from last week when starting to work with him on it. As a reminder, he isn't 6 months old yet either! I am thrilled with the progress he has made despite all those bumps in the road for him. I am so proud of my little man! :)
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| My little man practicing sitting up! |
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| Playing with his basket of toys. |
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| He did fall over quite a bit, but tried to pull himself back up. |
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| Just love that smile! |
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| Such a happy boy! |
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| How can you not love him?!?!? |
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Shelving issues...
Looks like I won't be putting anything in the bottom shelf, apparently Savannah claimed it as hers.  |
| This girl will find any place in the kitchen to hide...probably just planning on how to get more food :P |
From PA to MA
Officially in MA. What a wave of emotions that came crashing down on me the past couple of days! Now in no way do I want to sound ungrateful for all that people are doing for me here in MA and for and for all it took for me and the kids to get here, but in all honesty, this is not where I want to be. I love the new life the kids and I made together, I miss all my friends, I miss my house, my neighborhood, I am saddened that Sydney had to move away from all her new wonderful friends that she made, and I just miss PA overall. I know this is something that I have to do for financial reasons and for Xavier's health, but that doesn't mean my heart is here. :( My honest prayer is that God opens up doors to make it possible for the kids and I to one day (sooner rather than later) return to PA~that is where I would love our journey to take us back to.
The kids are adjusting well. They have learned throughout the years to go with the flow and take change easily. Sydney has moved 4 times in the past year and ten months, so she has got this moving things down pat. Savannah just goes where ever I go and is happy as long as I am with her and she is eating. : P Xavier is use to sleeping where ever, seeing as he has been in several different rooms in the hospital in the beginning of his life.
I am excited that I will be heading back to PA in just 8 short days for a period of 4 days. I will be just taking Xavier with me so the girls don't have to go through the trip again in just a short amount of time. Xavier still sleeps through most of the car ride and I would not feel comfortable leaving him for days. As much as I trust my Mom, Stepfather and Father, I wouldn't put that responsibility on someone like that seeing as he still needs a little more extra care and attention.
Unpacking and cleaning has been what occupies most of my days. I just have my room and a little of the girls room to finish and then I should be done. Then, in moves my dad and let the unpacking and rearranging begin again. The house that we are living in has a great set up. I have my own room, the girls share a room (transitioning Savannah into the bottom bunk of Sydney's bunk beds tonight), and Xavier has his room, and then there is another room which is the playroom/scrapbooking room. Obviously there is a kitchen, living room, 2 full baths (one of which has a whirlpool tub!), and then the finished basement is where my Dad will be residing, which has an office which he needs as he has a business that he runs from the house. There is also a 1 car garage and a large backyard for the kids to play. It suits the needs of everyone and is functional. I am thankful God provided us with a large house for all of use to live in together! I will post pictures soon :)
The kids are adjusting well. They have learned throughout the years to go with the flow and take change easily. Sydney has moved 4 times in the past year and ten months, so she has got this moving things down pat. Savannah just goes where ever I go and is happy as long as I am with her and she is eating. : P Xavier is use to sleeping where ever, seeing as he has been in several different rooms in the hospital in the beginning of his life.
I am excited that I will be heading back to PA in just 8 short days for a period of 4 days. I will be just taking Xavier with me so the girls don't have to go through the trip again in just a short amount of time. Xavier still sleeps through most of the car ride and I would not feel comfortable leaving him for days. As much as I trust my Mom, Stepfather and Father, I wouldn't put that responsibility on someone like that seeing as he still needs a little more extra care and attention.
Unpacking and cleaning has been what occupies most of my days. I just have my room and a little of the girls room to finish and then I should be done. Then, in moves my dad and let the unpacking and rearranging begin again. The house that we are living in has a great set up. I have my own room, the girls share a room (transitioning Savannah into the bottom bunk of Sydney's bunk beds tonight), and Xavier has his room, and then there is another room which is the playroom/scrapbooking room. Obviously there is a kitchen, living room, 2 full baths (one of which has a whirlpool tub!), and then the finished basement is where my Dad will be residing, which has an office which he needs as he has a business that he runs from the house. There is also a 1 car garage and a large backyard for the kids to play. It suits the needs of everyone and is functional. I am thankful God provided us with a large house for all of use to live in together! I will post pictures soon :)
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Last Night
Well, moving day is finally here, and I am still awake :P Thought about trying to get some sleep to make the drive~it's going to be difficult to sleep. As much as I am thankful to my friends and family up in MA and for Boston's Children's Hospital, my heart truly wants to stay in PA. I have made such wonderful friends and as the in-laws say, "I will always be apart of the family", so I have some great family here as well. My true hearts desire is to hopefully be back around this area again someday~praying for that!
Yesterday went well with the moving truck. Everyone who helped load the truck did a wonderful job! It was amazing how fast it took to load everything so neatly and get it very well organized. The rain thankfully held off but unfortunately the humidity was ridiculous!
Last night I was able to spend time with friends. It's so nice to not have to worry about packing and just enjoy my time with other adults. It wasn't as sad to say "see you later" as I thought it was going to be, but then again, I honestly don't think reality has sunk in. Tomorrow as we pull away I fear those tears. I will be back in less than 2 weeks, and I think that has something to do with me holding back the tears as well.
All I can do is sit back and watch God do wonderful think in my life our lives....so let the journey begin.....
Yesterday went well with the moving truck. Everyone who helped load the truck did a wonderful job! It was amazing how fast it took to load everything so neatly and get it very well organized. The rain thankfully held off but unfortunately the humidity was ridiculous!
Last night I was able to spend time with friends. It's so nice to not have to worry about packing and just enjoy my time with other adults. It wasn't as sad to say "see you later" as I thought it was going to be, but then again, I honestly don't think reality has sunk in. Tomorrow as we pull away I fear those tears. I will be back in less than 2 weeks, and I think that has something to do with me holding back the tears as well.
All I can do is sit back and watch God do wonderful think in my life our lives....so let the journey begin.....
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Sydney's words...
Last week the kids and I took a vacation and got away to Eastern PA for some fun and relaxation with some great college friends. My friends have 3 little boys ages 5, 3, and 10 months. Sydney took quite well to their 5 year old, Noah. It was too funny watching them interact together. We all had such a great time! So happy they are on our exact route when traveling back and forth from PA to MA!
During our stay there Sydney began calling Shawn, Rachel's husband, "Dad". I just felt so bad for her, she just wants someone to call "Dad" daily like everyone else seems to have. My heart just breaks for her. That's a void I can't fill~I can never give her her biological "Dad' back to her. Which brings me to my next story. One night while we were at their house we were all doing story and prayers before bed. Each of us took a turn praying and like every night we do at our house we pray for "Daddy". So that night I prayed "Please bring Daddy back to You that he begin to make the right choices and follow You" and Sydney must have only heard the first part because after we were done praying she saids to me, "Mommy, Daddy's never coming back". She just said it so matter of fact and moved on. She just amazes me how well she is doing with the "loss" of her father. She worries me in other ways like the walls she will put up or how this will effect her emotionally in the future. That is something I will have to deal with as each of the kids get older, they will each deal with it in their own ways especially because of their ages when everything happened. I know God will give me the words to say to them as their questions and situations arise. God will give them comfort, and they will grow up so unbelievably loved that they will not lack the feeling of being loved!
During our stay there Sydney began calling Shawn, Rachel's husband, "Dad". I just felt so bad for her, she just wants someone to call "Dad" daily like everyone else seems to have. My heart just breaks for her. That's a void I can't fill~I can never give her her biological "Dad' back to her. Which brings me to my next story. One night while we were at their house we were all doing story and prayers before bed. Each of us took a turn praying and like every night we do at our house we pray for "Daddy". So that night I prayed "Please bring Daddy back to You that he begin to make the right choices and follow You" and Sydney must have only heard the first part because after we were done praying she saids to me, "Mommy, Daddy's never coming back". She just said it so matter of fact and moved on. She just amazes me how well she is doing with the "loss" of her father. She worries me in other ways like the walls she will put up or how this will effect her emotionally in the future. That is something I will have to deal with as each of the kids get older, they will each deal with it in their own ways especially because of their ages when everything happened. I know God will give me the words to say to them as their questions and situations arise. God will give them comfort, and they will grow up so unbelievably loved that they will not lack the feeling of being loved!
Moving
Well, the time is coming quickly now, only 11 more days til the big move. A part of me wants to move and get to start over up in MA and know I will have constant help and support from my family and close friends, yet I have built a new life here with the 4 of us and I don't want to leave that. So as much as I am happy to move, I am very sad to leave this area and the wonderful people!
I am open to whatever the Lord has in store for me and my children, but I would love to move back to this area if I were able to. As much as I wanted to be as far as possible from the one person that tore our family apart, with the custody papers signed and approved by the judge, and seeing how at least this first year out of the state goes with visitations, I know I could handle living in this area again.
The children right now are my main priority and doing what is best for them at this time is to move. Xavier needs to be up at Boston Children's Hospital to get the second opinion and see where he stands with his heart and health issues. The kids need a little more one on one attention and living with my father and my mom and step father living 5 miles away will provide that for them. I am excited to be able to just take Sydney out and go on a date with my little girl. I enjoyed the time we were able to do that here, and would like more opportunities to do that with her. It's been difficult for her because she is the oldest and I have probably expected more out of her and help from her the past couple months than I should have. She has not really had that one on one attention that she needs and deserves with Xavier's health issues and being so young, and Savannah being attached to my hip ever since being away from her for so long during the hospital stays.
Another contributing factor in my decision to move was financial reasons. Clearly one can not survive on the child support of someone who is a waiter 3 days a week for 5 hours at a time. I have been so blessed with all the financial help so that I was able to stay here as long as needed until the move. The Lord ALWAYS provides~we have been a true testimony to that! We have been truly blessed!
There have been a myriad of things God has shown me or taught me through all this and one of them is to be more aware of others in need and trying to find ways to help/serve others in their time of need as others did in my time. The love and support that I had felt I want to pass on to others. Sadly it took something this major for me to really realize this is something that I should have been doing all along. We as Christ followers are called to serve others and be selfless, sounds easy in a way, but yet to have a constant daily attitude of that takes a changed heart and the work of the Holy Spirit.
Moving Prayer Requests:
*Packing gets accomplished (as I sit here writing this I should be packing :P )
*Safe travels for my dad as he comes out and for all of us as we travel to MA
*Everyone stays healthy between now and...well, until health insurance kicks in up in MA
*Transition for the kids
*Sad goodbyes aren't so difficult ~ as I sit here crying already :(
I am open to whatever the Lord has in store for me and my children, but I would love to move back to this area if I were able to. As much as I wanted to be as far as possible from the one person that tore our family apart, with the custody papers signed and approved by the judge, and seeing how at least this first year out of the state goes with visitations, I know I could handle living in this area again.
The children right now are my main priority and doing what is best for them at this time is to move. Xavier needs to be up at Boston Children's Hospital to get the second opinion and see where he stands with his heart and health issues. The kids need a little more one on one attention and living with my father and my mom and step father living 5 miles away will provide that for them. I am excited to be able to just take Sydney out and go on a date with my little girl. I enjoyed the time we were able to do that here, and would like more opportunities to do that with her. It's been difficult for her because she is the oldest and I have probably expected more out of her and help from her the past couple months than I should have. She has not really had that one on one attention that she needs and deserves with Xavier's health issues and being so young, and Savannah being attached to my hip ever since being away from her for so long during the hospital stays.
Another contributing factor in my decision to move was financial reasons. Clearly one can not survive on the child support of someone who is a waiter 3 days a week for 5 hours at a time. I have been so blessed with all the financial help so that I was able to stay here as long as needed until the move. The Lord ALWAYS provides~we have been a true testimony to that! We have been truly blessed!
There have been a myriad of things God has shown me or taught me through all this and one of them is to be more aware of others in need and trying to find ways to help/serve others in their time of need as others did in my time. The love and support that I had felt I want to pass on to others. Sadly it took something this major for me to really realize this is something that I should have been doing all along. We as Christ followers are called to serve others and be selfless, sounds easy in a way, but yet to have a constant daily attitude of that takes a changed heart and the work of the Holy Spirit.
Moving Prayer Requests:
*Packing gets accomplished (as I sit here writing this I should be packing :P )
*Safe travels for my dad as he comes out and for all of us as we travel to MA
*Everyone stays healthy between now and...well, until health insurance kicks in up in MA
*Transition for the kids
*Sad goodbyes aren't so difficult ~ as I sit here crying already :(
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